This is a talk I did at the Sunday Bible School class Suzy and I attend. As we are moving soon I was “moved” to offer up my spiritual journey in advance of my physical journey. Dean Brown the outstanding teacher of the class obliged and what follows is what I said that day. Most of the writing has appeared in parts in the Rocky Mountain Climbing Diary in prior versions and compiled and edited for the Trinity audience of friends and Disciples.

I want to apologize for not being able to attend class for the last 5-6 months. Many of you know that Suzy and I are moving to Colorado soon after my daughter graduates from high school. Over the last 18 months we bought, fixed up and moved in renters into a condo in Avon, Colorado. Started building a house in Eagle, Colorado. Went on numerous business trips from Atlanta to Santa Barbara. Had a couple of school visits. First my daughter Sarah was going to be a Missouri Tiger. She ended up an Aggie. Moved tenants out of the condo, fixed it up again, moved furniture into the condo to make it more saleable, sold it, moved furniture out, closed the sale. Put our house in Dallas on the market… and on and on. Oh yeah, Suzy just got a great job with a company based in New York.

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This is a really beautiful and moving video. That came from my friend Joyce. When I thanked her for sharing this with me, here is what she sent back:

I have been doing a lot of reading the last few years. William Barclay’s Commentaries of the New Testament, C.S. Lewis’s Mere Christianity and now his sermons compiled under the title The Weight of Glory, John Eldredge’s Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul and many more.

But I note The Weight of Glory and Wild at Heart in particular which will lead me through the rest of this writing.

I picked up The Weight of Glory at the last Walk to Emmaus where I was blessed to coach. Close beside it on the table was Wild at Heart which I had already read. These are two very different books but they collided in my head today and caused this writing.

I began reading the Lewis sermon upon returning from the Walk. As usual Lewis took a little time to warm up to his task, but when he got going what I read had to be one of the most beautiful statements about God ever produced outside of the Bible.

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Rocky Mountain Climbing # 22: Each Heartbeat Is a Prayer.

On my way to my Tuesday morning Emmaus Reunion Group meeting I was empressed with this thought:

“Each Heartbeat Is a Prayer”

I thought about this and mulled it around in my green mind trying to decide what to do with it and how it worked.

I thought of the Bible and how God knows the count of each hair on your head, it would stand to reason that He would know each heartbeat. And if you are living your life in God’s grace, then:

Each Heartbeat Is a Prayer.

I thought again and remembered that God even knew us in our mother’s womb, and He knew us from conception, the very first heartbeat, then you could say:

Each Heartbeat Is a Prayer.

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Rocky Mountain Climbing #10

Who do you pray for?

One of my most memorable experiences in Choices was the “Waterfall of Forgiveness”. 8.5 years ago I did not think I deserved forgiveness for leaving my marriage and two wonderful children. The experience I had helped me to allow forgiveness for myself. It did not take away the accountability for my actions, but it did allow me to move forward with more freedom and resolve.

Now I use the idea of the “waterfall” everyday when I do my daily devotional. In the last 8.5 years I probably have only forgotten to start my day doing this a handful of times. That is how important this has become in my life.

My devotional praying has changed over the years as I have met more and more people and have been influenced by the Holy Spirit. I know I can’t pray for everyone I would like to, but I make an honest attempt to keep people in my prayers.

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This is one of the most powerful things that is taught in Choices.

So why is it so hard to accept the gifts others so readily see in you?

You are not alone in this. It is one of the issues I struggle with based on my core tape: “I’m not good enough”.

When at Choices and when I am in my normal “human-ness” is when I have expectations for someone on what should happen for them, that is when I have missed the very miracles that God had placed me in position to see. When I am in my normal “human-ness” is when someone walks through the door on Wednesday and I hope they won’t be in my small group. That person was then ether the first person to make a beeline to my group or who at a later time I was to realize they were the one person I had needed to know.

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One of the things we do in Purpose is to tell people about finishing the Choices training. To do so, you must sponsor someone and come back and TA. I think some people continue to be in their fears about becoming a TA, hearing their tapes: “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not smart enough”… on and on.

I have information for you: you are good enough and you are smart enough and you do matter. But most of this is what you don’t know, so it doesn’t really help does it?

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